SO I arrived back on Australian shores a few days ago after 281 days overseas. I’m still not home however, I’ve been kicking it in Melbourne with a mate of mine from school who’s living here at the moment (I get home Monday night for all you Adelaideans). It’s been pretty darn rad so far. I got to my mate’s place mid-morning after picking up the keys from his swanky high-rise office, and turned on the TV to find day one of the first test between the Aussies and Kiwis being broadcast. I don’t really froth on my cricket like I used to when I was a grom but it was still sick to put my feet up and watch it while trying to relax away my next-level jetlag. Then I went to get some groceries from the supermarket but only made it as far as the sushi shop where I bought four of those big fuck-off hand rolls, which I couldn’t seem to find anywhere else on my travels. We sat next to a chick at the store who was on her phone telling her friend about how another bird they both knew had been acting like a ‘fucking bitch ay’. Oh Australia! I wanted to jump up and kiss her right there.
At Woolies I bought a box of cheddar Shapes and a Farmers Union Ice Coffee. Fuck it’s good to be back. I was going to try to describe my feelings when I first got on the airport shuttle bus – the sights and sounds of Australia – but it’s early and I aint in a writing mood. It’s good to have that familiarity back with everything. The weight of $1 and $2 coins in my hands, being able to speak my own language and people understand it even with my native twang, Eucalyptus errrverywhere. I’m starting to remember some of the shit things too (there aren’t many) e.g. stuff is mad expensive, we’re like the only country ever made where you can’t buy booze in supermarkets, our public transport systems leave a lot to be desired. But we got it lucky man, no foolin’. I spent a lot of time in the Third World during this trip (e.g. Bolivia, the poorest country in South America) and yeah, I don’t have any gems of knowledge or specific examples to lay on ya but we’ve got nothing to complain about. In Morocco I met dudes who spoke five languages but lived in relative poverty and couldn’t leave the country because getting a visa for anywhere is near-impossible. Even in the developed world I saw people in Struggletown – Portugal and Spain being the worst off (the unemployment rate in Malaga, Spain for example was more than 30 per cent when I visited, the highest rate in 13 years). I’m not sure what you’re supposed to take from all this. Now’s the perfect time to travel? Give to a charity? Be thankful for what you got? I dunno, just some food for thought. And if you don’t believe me, visit this site and chuck your details in. You might be surprised.